On Being Intentional | Personal

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Over the past few weeks, Seth and I have been making some changes to our habits. Like a lot of others, we have a tendency to come home from our day jobs, and just space out. He flips through channels on the TV and I hop on the computer to edit a session, catch up on blogging, answer emails, scroll through Facebook, and a slew of other internety things. Yup- internety is a word. I just made it up!

I said before that I wanted to be transparent in my blogging and my business- and this is the first of many posts in my efforts to be just that. I’ll be honest- the last 6 months of being a newlywed has been completely new territory. People tell you that the first year can be rough- but I don’t think any couple really believes that in the beginning. Don’t take this the wrong way at all- Seth and I are completely head over heels for each other! I’m just saying that in this new season of life, there are bound to be speed bumps. It’s all about how you navigate through them.

Which brings me back to what I was saying before.

Our habits of zoning out when we were at home weren’t doing great things for our marriage. It wasn’t exactly killing it, things have been good. But, they could have been great. A few weeks ago I posted about what worked, and what didn’t last year. I also set some important personal goals that I didn’t post:

1. Spend more time with my Bible.

2. Be more intentional in everything I do.

In the process of working on goal number one, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about goal number two. What does it mean, exactly, to “be intentional?” Well, it means I want there to be a solid REASON behind everything do. What good reason do I have to zone out on technology when I get home? None. What reason do I have to take a walk with Seth and Hailey when I get home? It gives us exercise and I get to spend time talking with my sweet husband! What does this mean for my business and the blog? Here are a few things that will be coming up soon:

1. More marriage focused blogging. I LOVE gorgeous weddings- that’s part of why I’m a wedding photographer! But it’s not the most important thing. I want to equip my couples with tools for having a beautiful marriage that lasts beyond their beautiful wedding day!

2. A new kind of portrait session. These portrait sessions will be offered in addition to my other offerings. Don’t worry- they’re not replacing anything! These will be for married couples- whether newlyweds or seasoned pros. I cannot WAIT to share the details of these with you!

3. A more emotion focused, intentional photography style. I still want to capture your beautiful details, but the focus will be more on the special and intimate moments that make up your big day.

With that in mind, I want to share one of my favorite marriage strengthening tools: “The 5 Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. I read it a few months ago, while Seth recently finished it. Let me tell you, this has been SO helpful. If you’ve never heard of this book before, I highly recommend you take a trip on over to Barnes and Noble or Amazon.com and pick up a copy. The premise of the book is that different people feel loved through different acts. Some people feel cared for when they receive little gifts, others especially enjoy acts of service such as having their husband gas up their car or take care of the dishes one night. Gary does an amazing job of explaining each love language and helping you to discover yours and your spouse’s! There is a short quiz in the back of the book than can help you nail it down.

After we finished this book, we both became more intentional in loving in each others language. It’s been great! It’s seriously amazing how different you feel and act when your “love tank” is full! In case you were wondering, my love language is “Quality Time,” while Seth’s is “Words of Affirmation.”

Since I value this book so much, I want to give away a copy! And because reading is always made better with Starbucks, I’ll throw in a gift card to cover a drink for you and your significant other! All you have to do is complete the steps to enter by clicking here or on the photo at the top of the page! The winner will be announced on Monday!

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4 thoughts on “On Being Intentional | Personal

  1. So fun! Love the 5 Love Languages and you’re right… It’s so easy to come home and each get into your own zone and neglect the time you could be spending together making your relationship awesome. Looking forward to your new posts! Maybe giving some fun date night ideas would be a nice addition!

  2. Love this Stacey!! I’m so glad you’re being more intentional not only with your individual time, but with your time together as a married couple! I’m so proud of you!!

  3. I really appreciate this post- the first year IS hard and it takes thought and work. Matt and I have almost been married a year and are going through the same thing as you and Seth- we definitely have a routine that doesn’t keep us as connected to each other. I was actually thinking about the five love languages this week (our pre-cana discussed it some) and wanted to give the book a read-through. I think I will now!

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